Sunday, December 23, 2018

Secret Santicorn: Kowloon Planet, High Rise Defenses and more.


This is for Michael Bacon I don't know where I'm going with this, so I'll try something.



D12 Terrifying Defenses.
  1. Retractable Spikes. They stab out when they sense something is there and slide back in when they sense weight on them. So you can't use them for climbing.
  2. Near friction-less Wall. Not deadly by itself but impassible and moving around it leads you into more terrible things.
  3. Automated Turrets, makes Swiss-cheese out of you.
  4. Drones with little dart guns that shoot neurotoxins into you're face. Induces seizures while up on the wall or causes you to become paralyzed and stuck until someone pries you off, if they can do it before you're found.
  5. Acid is poured down the side of the building, eats away at anything organic and most metals.
  6. Wall springs out Catapulting you through the air. Reroll this if it's on one of the lower levels.
  7. This section of wall has a series of metal bands on it, they have high voltage running through them.
  8. Sonic Cannon, powerful enought to blast holes through concrete, will make you're remains unrecognizable.
  9. An unreasonable amount of buzz saws.
  10. Pressurized air shoots out of a hidden vent, launching you off the building. Reroll if on one of the lower levels.
  11. Microscopic needles on the walls inject you with a fast acting poison and horrifying poison.
  12. A dude throwing rocks, scrap and literal shit from the roof, can't beat the classics. (He's also conveniently a look out who can call for back up if you get past the automated defenses.

D12 Treasures on Kowloon Planet
  1. A Glock.
  2. A packet of dinosaur egg oatmeal. Like they look like eggs when they dissolve there's these little dinosaurs. Probably long stale by this point, that doesn't matter it's a status symbol to have a packet.
  3. A 3-D printer that prints clips for holding clothes together. You're not sure how much plastic it's got left but even this is unbelievably useful.
  4. A working Alarm Clock.
  5. A high end prosthetic leg, custom fit for someone long dead.
  6. A solar panel.
  7. A mess of well preserved wires and miscellaneous electronic pieces. Miraculously untouched by the years really.
  8.  A lawn mower. 
  9. A Computer with "Slaves to Armok: God of Blood Chapter II: Dwarf Fortress" Version 1.2 on it. It is clearly a source of divination and occult secrets. 
  10. A laptop with 3D modeling software on it. 
  11. A Geiger Counter 
  12. A Jacket that is completely water proof and seems to react to the wearer for greater comfort.
I feel like some of the defenses feel a bit cartoony and the treasures feel more post-apocalpsy than si-fiy, so here is a third table free of charge. (Which doesn't make sense due to this being a gift, but that's beside the point.)


D12 Myths, Beliefs and Superstitions in the Ruined Cities.
  1. Once upon a time the earth was soft, but just as a child becomes harder and more wrinkly as they grow older, so did the land.
  2. Always be respectful to vending machines, it is bad luck to harm them.
  3. The ancients we're creatures of illusion and glamour. They they are still out there living below the hills and among the stars.
  4. The artifacts and craft that are to delicate to be built by human hand were made by gnomes, you can catch one and force it to make you something if it's hands are tied with string.
  5. It is bad luck to go to the Cursed Place. You're children will be born monsters if you go to the Cursed Place. You're name wither off you and everyone will forget you if you go to the Cursed Place.
  6. If you give you're name to the machines, the gnomes will have it.
  7. You can weather the Cursed Place if you carry a anointed flashlight in you're hand.
  8. If someone dies inside a building in their sleep, it's because an ancient tried to wake them.
  9. Rats know always know how to get to safety.
  10. Always keep both feet firmly on the ground when using a gun, to do otherwise is to invite the gun to possess you.
  11. The ancients made guns by placing the souls of murders in them. Never trust one.
  12. God speaks to us through computers. 

1 comment:

  1. Unreasonable numbers of buzzsaws can only mean Super Meat Boy.

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